A Quarter of a Year

Wow. How can 1/4 of the year go by before I post a new blog?
Here's how ...

Sat, Oct 20 - Go Alvin & Jenny!
Sat, Oct 27 - Go Corey (boyhood pal) and Nikki!
Sun, Nov 4 - Leading praise & worship for 1,000 teens @ Diocesan Jamboree
Sat, Nov 10 - Tepeyac Gala in D.C.
Sat, Nov 17 - Go Rox & Scott (in ME)
Thanksgiving, Nov 22 in K'zoo w/ the Guevaras
Thu-Fri, Nov 29-30 - Visiting Cheboygan
Sat, Dec 8 - Mom & Dad's 40 Anniv. in Rogers City
Weekend of Dec 14-16 - High School Retreat
Christmas weekend - Rogers City

10 straight weekends away from home.
So many blessings ... time well spent.
Plan for this weekend: staying home and building
couch forts with the fam.

Things I "love"

Not in a storge (family), phileo (friend), eros (wife) or agape (God) kind of way ... just stuff that really "floats my boat": * When the bottle return machine works properly and they offer you hand sanitizer * When you go to check out and realize the item is cheaper than advertised * When both kids fall asleep in the car and you have a book to read and time to do it * When your computer issue is solved by a reboot * When your clothes fit the way you want * How your donated junk fills someone else's need * How someone else's junk fills my need * The fact that I can get my family food, ice cream, groceries, a pony ride and Starbucks at Meijer. * When you pull up to a gas station in the rain only to find out it's a full service station * When you realize you actually brought the thing you thought you forgot * When you realize the thing you stressed about forgetting is actually not needed at all * How recycling actually makes a huge dent in the amount of trash you send to a landfill * Bonfires with s'mores * Choosing between dogs and brats ... then going back and getting what you didn't choose the first time * When all the food in the fridge gets eaten * That one day a week when all the laundry, dishes and food prep is done (or maybe one hour a week) * When the guy that was tailing you on the road gets pulled over a few miles ahead * When you realize something you've been searching for has always been right in front of you

Why We Do What We Do

Luci and Lijah taking a park break before the Ponce wedding, Kankakee, IL.

He just loves her so much.
And she tolerates his love so well.

Zone D

I have a feeling that Elijah will be able to pick apart zone defenses. It's all about patience, ball movement, seeing the entire floor finding the weakness in the scheme and exploiting it all day. He practices on me everytime I have the kids by myself. And he does it with a smile.

Thirty-four

I think it's funny how people grimace at the thought/reality of growing older. I don't think I'll ever try to hide my age. I don't wish to be any other age. Granted, I do miss playing kick the can all night or hanging out at Silverman's until 3AM, but then again, I really don't. I firmly believe that if you're at a place in your life where you are not "at peace," then it is your duty, your right, to change that. For, we are all called to freedom (Gal 5:13) Although not always possible, by our own power alone, there have always seemed to be "uneasiness" to deal with along the way to peace. I have found that freedom comes at the cost of severing ties with those things that appear to grant freedom, when in fact, they are nothing more than shackles. I read a quote on a wall today: "how old would you be if you didn't know how old you were?" I turned 34 today ... and the thought that kept popping into my mind was, "how far have I come in 17 years?" I have worked with high schoolers just about every day for the past 7 years ... many of whom are 17 years old. Most of what I try to communicate to them are things that I wished I had truly "heard" when I was their age: Pornography and fornication will wreck you. Bad spending habits are really bad. You're worth more than people give you credit for. Getting drunk will just make you even dumber. Abortion is murder. Jesus is God. You should know your Bible. You should know what the Church teaches. Don't try to be God. Don't try to make up your own religion. Absolute truth exists. Satan is a freaking liar. It's simply not all about you. The opposite of love is not hate; it's using people. I pray that I may be open to those things that I need to "hear" right now so that, God willing, in another 17 years I will not have the same faith as that of the 34-year old GaryG.

6 Years

Mad and I married on this day 6 years ago. A Saturday, just like today. And it rained today, just like it did on our way to Ludington. So many of our friends have married since with still so many more to go. And so many of our friends have kids like us with still so many more to go. We had planned to go up north to the lake - a redo from a few weeks back when the kids got sick. But instead, a tornado came close by and flooded our basement. And my wife got sick. And the kids got cabin fever. But as I sit watching my family getting ready for bed, with my wife singing some tickling song: "x marks the spot with a dot, dot, dot ... put cacti on your back and watch the juice flow out ..." (Something I guess she learned from Reno's sis) I realize what a blessing it is to have the opportunity to be the father of this family and to keep her on course throughout the storms, floods, sickness and pestilence. Yes, I'm tired right now but by God's grace I am able to wake up and persevere in the good fight. Thank you, Lord, for six of the most blessed years of my life.

Prayer

A first, not a last resort ... and the last resort. In good and bad times. A strengthening of a relationship with a "Higher Power" like talking to my wife everyday, or my kids, or my really good friends or anyone I need to talk to. Not just about things I want (that would be a Genie) Not just to work out issues that I have (that would be a counselor) Not just to go over my schedule for the day (that would be my secretary) But prayer is simply conversing with the One Who loved first that I might love Who IS love. So why isn't there enough love in the world? There isn't enough prayer. I never understood this until I began making prayer a habit. And I still don't get it sometimes.

Pure Joy - Rehoboth Beach, VA edition

There's just something about ice cream and the beach.

Lijahboy had his dream of braving the crashing waves of the Atlantic
and having an entire mint chocolate cone to himself. Messy boy.

But pure joy was best summed up by another little boy I saw
about 8 yrs old
Latino heritage
a little chubby
fighting against the sun to maintain his ice cream cone
unaware of the dribble
down his bare belly

and on his back left shoulderblade.

Pure joy.

How do I look?

Kennedy* is a lady who lives at a nursing home I visit. Wheelchair-bound and suffering from a host of ailments, I used to have a lot of trouble understanding her. I now understand about 80% of what she tells me. She shakes a lot and always has her neck crooked uncomfortably. If you saw her in a mall, you'd probably pretend that you didn't see her just to avoid the "oh, what should I say" or "what do I do." I found her in the hall the other day, but she had no hair. Apparently, she was always wearing a wig whenever I saw her. When I greeted her, she said something inaudible to me. As I bent down, I realized what she had said. "I don't want you to see me like this." I didn't even know what to say. I could have said, "Oh, you're always beautiful to me" or "you're just fine," but anyone who has ever had a surprise visit on a bad hair day can attest to the fact that any words are just a bunch of crap. You'll still feel dirty, nasty, stinky ... Adam and Eve had a thing about the way they looked after the fall. Thus the whole "naked" thing. They even hid. They didn't want God to see them like that. They felt dirty, nasty, stinky ... And yet, He always wants to see us. We're always beautiful to him. We're His kids. And, someday, in spite of our dirtiness, nastiness and stinkiness ... He'll want us to come home. And everyone looks great in heaven. *name changed for privacy

Simple Solutions

Due to an upcoming vacation on the road, we now have a car DVD system. I typically don't read instruction manuals, but I wanted to secure the straps properly. That's when I came across the "Troubleshooting" section: Problem - The player cannot play. Possible Cause - There may not be any discs in the DVD drive. Possible Solution - Put a disc into the DVD drive. Problem - There is no sound. Possible Cause - The speaker may not be turned on. Possible Solution - Turn on the speaker. Problem - The remote control does not work. Possible Cause - The batteries of remote control may be out of power or weak. Possible Solution - Replace the batteries. Alas, support for why I don't read these manuals. But it got me reflecting on those shaky, post-collegiate, lost-in-life, corn-gone-wrong days. I wish I could have seen this manual: Problem - I'm not feeling spiritually connected with God. Possible Cause - Not going to Church. Possible Solution - Go to Church. Problem - I'm indulging in bad habits that have me in a vicious cycle. Possible Cause - Too many negative "friend" influences. Possible Solution - Find good friend influences. Problem - I'm lost. Possible Cause - You're listening to the wrong sources. Possible Solution - Listen to the right Source. I have a feeling that when I'm old and bound in a wheelchair and dependent on others to eat, bathe and wipe my butt that I'll realize that life's solutions are really quite simple.

Melted

The last thing Luci said to me before she slept the other night: "Sweet dreams, daddy." I melted. Lijah loves to snuggle most with big sister. I melted again. My wife left a warm pot of stew for me after a long day at work. I almost picked up Burger King, but I'm sick of that garbage. And they don't serve rice. Melted thrice.

Sacred Time

A priest reminded me that time with my family is "sacred time." Just as the Church asks us to be "fully, actively and consciously" participating in the Mass, which usually comes to mind when thinking of "sacred time," so must I be fully, actively and consciously participating with my family. I doubt seriously that watching daddy's shows or surfing the net during my familial "sacred time" warrants such a title. Unless, of course, I'm trying to teach my kids how to be a sports fan. "...notice how in order to do anything worthwhile, [a donkey] has to allow itself to be ruled by the will of whoever is leading it. On its own the donkey would only ... make an ass of itself." - St. Josemaria Escriva, The Forge, no. 381

Nervous

I was privileged to be asked by the
graduates at my former school to be
this year's commencement speaker.

Our school has traditionally chosen
a pastor at a graduate's church ... in
Protestant terms, I am technically a
'youth pastor' at my church.

For the first time in a long time I was
nervous. Singing in front of crowds is fine.
So is public speaking. But I was about to
give a rah-rah charge to the graduates as
a youth pastor in front of about 5 current
or retired pastors (among the guests that
evening). And I'm the lone Catholic.

I love our separated brethren from other
Christian denominations. I believe there is
fruit to be gained from constructive, candid
ecumenism. But generally speaking, Catholics
are not known for their preaching.

To top it off, we gave out diplomas before the
speech, which curiously generated tears in me
for the first time at graduation. I could attribute
this to nerves, but I've known this set of seniors
since the 6th grade ... and after what our school
went through a couple years back ... this day wasn't
'supposed' to happen.

Finally, the principal, a woman I love and admire
deeply, introduced me in tears as one of her 'sons.'
As I hugged her, I cried and said, "this is gonna be
so hard to do."

As I awkwardly arranged my notes and Bible on a
tiny podium that I have used at that school so many
times before, I looked into the eyes of the grads and
my tears cleared. I said a quick prayer (into the mic)
for myself and I began.

I don't remember much of my charge. All I remember
is how much I love those kids. And after having kids of
my own, I remember thinking how privileged I was to
have parents trust me with their kids, and how they continue
to do so at my church. I don't care if those grads remember
a word I said ... I just want them to remember that the
reality of love, as a gift of God and spread through mankind,
is tangible, attainable and worth getting nervous for.

Circles in the Sand

I wonder if Belinda Carlisle
was writing about Jesus
when those 'righteous men'
were about to stone the adultress

Something I heard

There are no obstacles to living a faithful life ...
only excuses.

Be Careful What you Pray For

So I got sick in November.
Nothing big, just a nasty cold.
So I canceled a youth event
that would have been to see a
presentation by Youth to Youth
Catholic Evangelization on the topic of
'Salvation History.'

I called everyone who I had RSVP'd,
but decided to go the church to make
sure no one else showed up.
A kid did. And I told him we canceled.
And he looked bummed.

It takes a lot for a teen to give up
everything this world offers him
to come to something at church.
I wanted to just take him, but my
body wouldn't let me.
Then, I prayed, "God please don't let
me lose him."

About a month later, he shows up
at a weekend retreat.
And yesterday, he said he had
"questions."

Like:
How do we even know if God exists?
How can we trust what the Bible says is true?
How do we know we're even worshipping God?
...
...

Now it's in my court.
But, if it were completely up to me
he'd get no answers at all.
Cuz I don't have them all.
Which is why I pray.
To get those answers.
"Ask and you shall receive."

Just be careful what you pray for.
You just might get it.

Family Center for Women & Children

I had the opportunity to take a few teens
to an emergency shelter for women and children.
We were scheduled to serve food, clean up,
and babysit while the moms attended a Bible study.

Their motto: "Meeting physical needs to bring
those with spiritual needs to Christ."

Most of the women were younger than me.
And most of the children were the same age
as Luci & Lijah.

And this shelter is only a few miles from my home.

It amazes me that I worry at times
about crap that just doesn't matter.
And these women and children
have hope in what tomorrow will bring.
Hope in finding employment.
Hope in finishing a GED.
Hope in getting an extension to stay at the shelter
so their children won't freeze outside.

Praise the Lord for the good people
who work at the Center to empower
the truly needy to help themselves.

But pray to the Lord
that we will never forget
that these women and children
are our women and children.

2007

2 years ago it was "Finish."
This past year it was "For the Kingdom."
This Year's theme for me is
"Disciple."

Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1) - Cite This Source
dis·ci·ple /dɪˈsaɪpəl/ Pronunciation Key - Show
Spelled Pronunciation[di-sahy-puhl] Pronunciation Key
- Show IPA Pronunciation noun, verb, -pled, -pling.
–noun

1. Religion.
a. one of the 12 personal followers of Christ.
b. one of the 70 followers sent forth by Christ. Luke 10:1.
c. any other professed follower of Christ in His lifetime.
2. any follower of Christ.
3. (initial capital letter) a member of the Disciples of Christ.
4. a person who is a pupil or an adherent of the doctrines of
another; follower: a disciple of Freud. –verb (used with object)
5. Archaic. to convert into a disciple.
6. Obsolete. to teach; train.

Most people would tend towards definitions 1-5.
I agree, but I've always liked the fact that definition 6
ties in with the similarity between the words
"disciple" and "discipline."

Everything in life worth anything requires
a dying to oneself in order to achieve it.
I love my kids, but I really don't sleep anymore.
I love studying theology, but I gave up a basketball league
on Saturdays for 4.5 years.
I love power steering, but I'll take air conditioning on
a hot day every time (reference to my 11-year old car).

A sister asked her brother
how one becomes a saint.
He said, "you will it."
His name was St. Thomas Aquinas.

Think how much better the world would be
if we all just "willed it" to be.
I'm guessing that
we'd all have to die to ourselves
just a little bit.

Here's to being a Disciple.